Top Funny Quotes That Will Make You LOL

Read more Funny Christian Quotes  and Funny Christian Sayings . Let these funny Christian Quotes add some humor to your life.   Funniest Christion Quotes & Sayings Always remember that Hell is really un-cool. Jesus is God's selfie. Honk if you love Jesus. Text and drive if you want to meet him. God wants spiritual fruit, not religious nuts. Need a lifeguard? He walks on water. The best vitamin for a believer is B1. When you throw mud, you lose ground. Call 911; our pastor is on fire! If you are more fortunate than others, build a longer table, not a taller fence. Visitors welcomed. Members expected. Lord, help us be the people our dogs think we are. Is prayer your steering wheel or your spare tire? The struggle is real but so is God. Looking for the perfect gift? Find Him here. You have one new friend request from: Jesus. When gratitude becomes your default setting, life changes. Less hate, more pancakes. Don't make me come down there. – God How do we make Holy Water? We b...

Here are some beautiful You Complete Me Quotes for Her / Him. Read and share on Facebook, Twitter and Blogs.  Because You Complete Me Quotes Many works of the past complete what they announce they are going to do, to our increasing boredom. Certain others plague me because I cannot follow their intentions. I can tell at a glance what Fabritius is doing, but I am spending my life trying to find out what Rembrandt was up to. - Philip Guston    It is very unkind of you to feel this way. Any woman should properly yield, it seems to me, even a complete stranger, because that is the way of the world....   All I desire is solace from the flood of memories that overwhelms me. - Murasaki Shikibu You can't ever approach a book as a complete virgin, certainly not if you're a critic. There is a lot of bad faith out there. That's why I finally trained myself not to look at this stuff anymore, because it doesn't do me any good to see myself either praised or attacked. - Paul Auste...

Having a really rough day at work? These seriously nurses funny quotes and ecards can make your day so much better.  Check out our awesome collection below Nursing Funny Quotes  "And don’t forget to tie the back because no one wants to see your ass, either!!! "Umm 1 actually, and it’s in my hair." "Also Read: 15 Funny Signs You Grew Up With A Mom Who Is A Nurse." “3 AM: the time when you remember you forgot to chart that thing, bring that lady her water, or pass that med.”--unknown Nurses Funny Quotes “Nursing is not for the empty of heart...nor the faint of heart. ” –unknown I love ICU! Changes my “Hey, I just paged you.. yes, it’s crazy.. I need more orders.. So call me, maybe?” "I cannot even tell you how many times I have said these exact words out loud……" "Yes, this is my life. It’s called being a nurse!" "Document it and watch it for the train wreck that it is!" "When nurses tell gross stories to their friends…" ...

A Great List About Men Funny Quotes Funny Quotes About Men There’s very little advice in men’s magazines, because men don’t think there’s a lot they don’t know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, “I know what I’m doing, just show me somebody naked. – Jerry Seinfeld Don’t expect a woman that has no money to think negative And never expect a man loaded with cash to think positive. Men are like a pair of high heel shoes you wear them use them and throw them away for a new pair. The way to man’s heart is through an incision. Men are like purses. Cute, full of sh*t and replaceable.:) Men are stupid, if you forget this just give it a min, they’ll remind you again. Women always worry about things that men forget; men always worry about things women remember. – Albert Einstein He suffers from delusions of grandeur; nevertheless he is truly grand! – Boghos L. Artinian Chocolate, men, coffee – some things are better rich. Women now have choices. They can be married, not marr...

Explore sarcastic minion quotes: Funny  minions are cute and lovely. They are very funny. They make people laugh with their silly things. They laugh at each other.   Sarcastic Minion Quotes 1. “Don’t worry about getting older. You still get to do stupid things, only slower.” 2. “Respect your parents. They passed school without Google!” 3. “I might look like I’m doing nothing but in my head, I’m quite busy.” 4. “I love my six-pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.” 5. “Things to do today: 1. Get up. 2. Survive. 3. Go back to bed.” 6. “I hate it when people are at your house and ask ‘Do you have a bathroom?’ No, we pee in the yard.” 7. “Alcohol does not make you fat it makes you lean… Against tables, chairs, floors, walls, and ugly people.” 8. “My Saturday was going pretty well until I realized it was Sunday.” 9. “OMG! I almost went to the toilet without my phone!” 10. “The best feeling is waking up in the middle of the night and realizing you still have hours to sleep....